Our Fine Girls are Single and Seriously Searching!-
OlumideJune
Recently
i overheard some people arguing on factors responsible for why we have
so many ladies and potential wife materials still single in their late
twenties and thirties not by choice but for not having found what they
need. This leads to my discussion of what will help to answer the
questions such as "At what point do ladies miss it? and at what point do
they start getting desperate?
Based
on the conversation that day, i discovered that not all ladies miss it,
some are just unlucky not to have ever been in a place where they get
to meet people to socialize with, while some are always
in the wrong gathering. Let's start from the scratch. A girl leaves
secondary school with the proper lessons parents have put in them
"Don't ever go near a man, they will get you pregnant". Some girls get
exploratory and they want to feel what it looks like and so they
disobey. Others are obedient and don't go near men. While others are so
rigid they don't even want to see men. With these three categories
created i am sure you can identify where you fell under back then in
high school.
Now
all these three categories leave high school and some go straight into
Uni. while some have to wait some years to gain admission into Uni. In
the process some change status. The explorers keep exploring, the
obedient ones sometimes get into relationships and want to explore and
the rigid after seeing that it would
not be bad having a taste sometimes change from been rigid to just been
obedient and give a clause i will only get close to my boyfriend while
some still remain so rigid. Now this stage is the stage where decisions
made either affect lives positively or otherwise.
Some
ladies have actually missed it out of greed while others have missed it
out of ignorance but i think majority have missed it out of wrong
decisions they made between the ages of 18 and 24.
I
remember back in school then, you hear ladies say i can't date someone
in the same class with me, others will say i can't date someone in the
same school with me, others will say i can't date someone my level or
someone still in school and the list goes on and on. Looking back
now these same people are desperately looking for someone to just say
will you marry me even if he is 4 years younger than them, without a job
and probably has a wife or has kids. This leads me to the question why
put yourself in this tight corner. Why not make the right decisions
early so not to settle for whatever comes your way.
Now
that the ladies are in their late twenties and thirties with some not
having any single record of a relationship and others having terrible
records, the same guys who they once said NO to will now want to get
married because the future is now becoming real and then think, these
ladies who are single because of their saying NO
"To a Guy because he isn't that prince charming you daydreamed about.
To a Guy because you are looking for the guy who has got same background as you.
To a Guy because he doesn't have that swags your former boyfriends had forgetting they all dumped you.
To
a Guy because you are in the same class or level forgetting that it
pays to be there when the struggle begins so that you can be referenced
when the struggle ends."
Will
this girl who has said NO because of all these things stay with me if
things get rough? and the answer they conclude with is NO so the men also
end
up looking for someone who is not their level and who they believe will
not say NO because of all the above therefore the circle keeps rotating
and the ladies tend to get desperate more as the day goes by.
Over
the years you will discover that the wrong decisions made were based on
the fact that they never looked into the future. All they were after
was the immediate benefits or status, you see a girl will prefer to date
a drug addict or a boy they know has another girlfriend just because
the boy is popular and drives daddy's car and goes to club and has
little cash to spend. Such girls will forfeit their opportunities of
having a guy who is focused, hardworking and has got a great future
ahead, just because the boy is still struggling at the moment. These
girls forget it is always sweet to suffer early so that
they will enjoy in the future. The old saying goes thus " It is the
woman who endures when it is rough that enjoys the benefits of
relationships/marriage" which means it doesn't have to be smooth all
from the scratch. But our present generation want it all smooth and that
is why the rate of divorce and breakups has risen in such an alarming
rate.
But
come to think of it, being single is not a crime after all. Do we have
to jeopardise our lives more after knowing fully well that we made some
wrong decisions in the past? The answer is NO. So why get desperate? Why
settle for whatever comes your way? Why not strategize a plan B if
marriage does not come knocking? Why live a miserable life all because
you wanted to be called a married woman? WHY??????????????
N.B When this post was sent to me by the author OlumideJune, he titled it 'When Ladies miss it and get desperate'. However i have retitled it. I am not sure i totally agree with him, i shall soon come up with my own opinion on this topic. Send us your opinion on why the single ladies are increasing and dont tell me men are unserious.
I believe there is a part 2 to this piece, watch this space
Thank you
This work shall not be copied or republished without permission of the author OlumideJune. (C) 2012.
